December 31st, 2009

Change is constant. Wonder whats next.

December 30th, 2009

What is more important to one's life? To be successful in life or to be happy?

December 22nd, 2009

Should I die a strong successful obsessive man or should I die a weak happy married man? Why can't I have both?

December 19th, 2009

It seems that I am in constant search for a salvation, the answer to my one ultimate prayers. I looked for it in many items, people, and places but it all seems at dead ends. I know Jesus is my salvation, but the promise of never being hungry and thirsty again...well it seems unanswered, I am still hungry and thirsty and there still remains a gap inside of me. And I have my doubts that this prayer will become a no.

December 18th, 2009

Goodbye good times of the past, a friendship of decades, and to a thread that held itself together but now must be cut. Its almost official when I announce, I am completely alone now.

December 10th, 2009

Why can't older people stay old. Or basically to the point, act your own age please. It surprises me in what I see often when I am out in public obvserving society and its ways. I often hear childish conversation involving a 30 year old mother of 3 arguing over the phone about cybermyspace drama having a personality of a teen drama queen. Or seeing 60 year old man with grey hair and wrinkles dressed in 15 year old thug clothing, walking like hes reppin some hood. And of course we can't forget the mom who is in her mid 40s dressing in an outfit that is sure to belong to her teen daughter.

Why can't grey hair be looked on as appreciated? I mean when I see grey hair I often see a lifte time of wisdom and knowledge. But now it seems that people do not want to escape thier highschool years or claim no responsibilities to thier own age.
In honesty being around such people really just makes me... feel old.

December 7th, 2009

Thought of the day is going to be mildy altered so I can blog only during days when there is a highly inspired thought. Therefore this will no longer be a daily thing and to avoid it from becoming a jounal entry of the day. I would rather do this so I can avoid coming up with last minute blogs and to lessen the Kirby dancing on random days.


And for my main thought of the day: Once again I have done it, turned down a request to smoke a roach. Not once but several times, in my true defense. I know my own value better then they know thier own.
And even so if I wanted to, the truth is I almost lack in free willl. No matter how hard I try, I can never seem to turn against my own God given goodnature. Even after our arguments and debates, I still can't help but to be good in ways.

December 6th, 2009

Because only I am so lucky to get punched in the face by a complete random stranger whose reasons are unkown. Thank you God for using my horrible luck for your sense of humor. Its nice to know there was a purpose behind that event.

December 5th, 2009

Looks like its back to status quoe with my family life.. I swear I thought we had been through this already but it appears one of our family member will never change thier ways (not surprising). My departure is no longer post poned to summer but earlier. I really do not want to be here when it all falls apart.

December 4th, 2009

Cold weather, rain and a day off! Could my day get any better? Or is it selfishly positive because nothing inteferes with my safe little worldly bubble and I am a man without sympathy or care for what lays outside of it?...Because if thats so I really do question, should I continue it or should I let it go?...Its an obvious answer one that I must act upon

December 3rd, 2009

<(^^<)                <(^^)^          <(^^)>          ^(^^)>          (>^^)>

Kirby dance

December 2nd, 2009

...........(too lazy to come up with anything)

December 1st, 2009

Apperently it is possible to nuke your PC just using a coke can and a hammer. Though the hammer is the key ingredient in this processs.

November 29th, 2009

-----------Due to technical difficulties with internet 11/29/09 Blog of the day will not be posted--------------

November 29th, 2009

What am I still doing here in Florida? Still waiting on saving up so I can pay the bloody expenses for at least rent. Attempting to work out my financial aid with Columbia Chicago College so the investment in an education may help me in pursuing my dream career.  *sigh*  I'm wishing for a white Christmas, but I will have to wait for another year. It seems there really is nothing here left for me. I'm just simply in a waiting room anticipating my time of departure.

November 28th, 2009

"Tis a good day, my day was unkind to me, brutal and smiteful at my very name. But tis a good day because someone today smiled. So its a good day."

November 27th, 2009

When greed become the mind set people's heart, we then cease being humanity but have become reckless beasts. Go to store with great sales on this day and see just how truthful that is. Are we angels or are we animals?

November 26th, 2009

I am thankful for many things. Though I tend to be the most pessimistic optimist, I am still blessed that things through my life are just right. Yes i have gone the extremes in and out several times, but still to know that the important things in life are still there, it gives me a better appreciation for things I take forgranted.

So I am thankful for God being in control of all things, but I am shameful for failling to recognize that as I should have.

November 25th, 2009

Seeing that its going to be thanksgiving tomorrow. I was wondering, how do native americans feel about this National Holiday?

November 24th, 2009

Plans without action = wasting time. Pretty much to summarize my day

November 23rd, 2009

"where can I find the evaporated milk?"
"Aisle 4 mam" I replied

"where can I find the pie crust?"
"Aisle 4, sir" I replied again to a different customer

"where can I find pumkin in a can?"
"Aisle 4!" I said in frustration

"Where can i find pudding packet at?"
"Aisle 4.." I say in tears

"Where can I find the turky?"
"Where can I find the bathroom?"
"Where can I find my house at?"
"Where can I find Valentines items?"
"Where can I find Osama Bin Laden?"
"Where can I find the fountain of youth?"
In a panic I reply "Aisle 4, aisle 4, aisle 4, aisle 4!!..oh ehh...aisle 2,  Aiiiiislllee 4!!!!!"

8hrs later after just leaving work I am found rocking back and forth in the corner of my bedroom repeating "Aisle 4, aisle4". Just another work day nothing to worry about.

November 22nd, 2009

Having Nightmares is a good way to appreciate ones life. Makes you realize your living in a better condition and that being alive is so great.

November 20th, 2009

I wish I could understand my glummness. Something that most strongly tell me to disown, yet I don't want to let go. My mind has accepted it as being true because it sees no other. And till that changes, that point of view is all I am going to be able to see.

November 19th, 2009

Its 2:30am, why am I still up? I have to get up for work tomorrow and 12hrs from now I need to be at work? So no statement or mood status just simply an indication that I have no life and I need some sleep lol

November 19th, 2009

Marriage...thats all I can think of at this moment...I blame the tenchi series for that. 

November 18th, 2009

As I ride my stores mart cart (the electric cart old people tend to use) to its parking location I spot a few cute girls who walk by. A humorous thought goes through my head of how would they respond if I were to speak slyly in saying with a smooth tone "Hey pretty ladies". Of course they would probably laugh at me but I think the after-reaction would be worth seeing. But knowing that being in a mart cart is no way of displaying first impression, a thought then goes through my mind. "What does it bloody matter if they don't accept me while in a mart cart? Its obvious they won't accept me either way. But...but if they don't accept me at all then they are not worth the time anyways, because the love of my life will see through the mart cart and see me as who I truly am. And thats all that matters."  Love of my life...I often question does that even exist.

November 17th, 2009

Looks like the better days are finally getting closer then ever before. But in this situation I now see that impatience plays no part in my waiting. Looks like a season worth chasing.

November 16th, 2009

I wish to be limitless, wish to expand my grounds and travel on for great distances to get to where I want to be and/or to get what I want and who I want.

November 15th, 2009

Apparently it takes a professional technician to fix a modem rather then an 18 year old man who can recoinize when things go Beep it means it works. (learned it the hard way)

November 14th, 2009

I'm young, I'm healthy, I'm not really poor, I'm fixed upon achieving my goals, and I'm very mature for my age. But yet despite being in such a condition that most would love to be right now the downfall is that I'm too young for my age and I'd rather hang out with 30 year olds then people my age because I simply think they are idiots. Idiots who make bad life choices that I know will be an "I told you so". I wish I was 10 years older and not seen as a bloody kid =(

November 13th 2009

To be isolated from society is to be an observer of typical repeats

November 12th, 2009

What is it about cold weather that makes me feel so happy? That brings both past and future together into the present . It makes me breathe in deply and exhale with a smile of what had happened and whats going to happen. I love the cold weather.

November 11, 2009

                
Marco = Mexican x Mexican,  Mexican = hardworker, therefore Marco = hardworker x hardworker

In conclusion Marco = Quality Worker

But why does such a quality worker get paid so little. Its simple theres over 11million meaning that I'm easy to replace + its expected of us therefore my quality work is reduced to cheapness. Never thought I would say this but, dam the other 10,999,999 mexicans. =*(

                

November 10th 2009

Pushing carts + rainy night = fun

November 9th 2009

Pushing carts, scraping muck, scrubbing toilets, sweeping floors, bagging groceries and mopping spills in a minumum wage job is not a good way of attracting women despite being a hard worker. Looking hunky, being shallow, driving a nice car, smiling, and being unemployed (but getting allowance from rich father) will. *sigh* The life of a worker is so unrewarding. A worker cannot keep up with the desires of a women.

November 8, 2009

I want to know how it would feel to get punched in the face and break my nose in the process but out of such an unexpected random event like Christmas